“THE DEAR HARRY LETTERS”

Dear Harry,

I’m confused.  Whenever I sell a stock it  goes up!  Whenever I buy, it drops!  Is somebody trying to tell me something?

Dear Confused,

You‘re not alone. Your solution is simple—sell “short”; if that doesn’t work, buy bonds!  If that doesn’t work, buy a gun! If that doesn’t work, write to Dear Abby.

                 ==================

Dear Harry,

When is the best time to buy  bargains!

Dear Bargain  Hunter,

December 26^th —Stupid!

             =================== 

Dear Harry

I want to invest for my niece’s future. Where do you see the stock market in five years?

 

Dear Aunt-ticipator,

If not on Wall Street,  surely on the Internet.

               ===================

Dear Harry,

I hear there’s big bucks in the commodity markets, but big risks too.  I’m itching to get on track.  You know, learn the tricks.  Do you know of a safe way?

Dear Itchy,

You're on track—Safeway, Publics, Winn-Dixie, they’re all OK. My rules are simple—comparison shop and  check prices; never shop when you’re hungry; buy cheap and only what you can eat; don’t  put all your eggs in one basket and don’t  pack fruit with can goods. Sampling is OK, but I don’t condone undergarment- harnessed shoplifting! And happy marketing!

            ======================

TO SEEK HARRY-THE-TIPSTERS ADVICE, TELL HIM OFF, VENT SOMETHING STOCK MARKET-ISH, OR WHATEVER!—DIRECT YOUR E-MAIL To- Gamemastersintl@lycos.com/dearharry